Thursday, March 11, 2010

My special girl.

This week we were lucky to have a lovely and delightful house guest and her daughter staying with us for a few days.  Her daughter is four months older than Hazel.  Her daughter not only speaks in complete sentences but can count, knows her alphabet and is fully potty trained.  So we were oogling over how smart she was at the lunch table the other day when she and her mother headed off to the potty.  We continued to oogle at her intelligence while she was in the bathroom when our conversation was interrupted by my intervening in Hazel retrieving herself a snack from the trash can.  "Hazel! We do  not eat garbage."  Then not thirty seconds later she came wandering in with a brown paper sack on her head.  I laugh, knowing full well that she is a smart girl.  She is certainly up to par in all other areas of development...cognitive, gross motor, fine motor, social, etc.  However, her speech is at about an 8 month level.  When she was 8 or 9 months old she would babble the appropriate consonants, mama, dada, baba, lala but she has since stopped.  She makes noise, she babbles, she is progressing along some other verbal milestones with intonation and whatnot, but still is not forming words the way she should.  She had issues with eating when she was born and continues to be picky with "how" she eats things.  I am not overly concerned because as a mother of four children I also know that they all develop at their own rate.  Haley, though capable of telling us what she wanted, did not start really speaking until she was nearly 3.  Abby was pretty average and then we had Mia who was saying "Shamu, cheeseburger" and "fo shizzle" at 18 months.  Hazel knows about 10-12 signs but only uses about 3 or 4 unprompted.
And while it's obvious that as the youngest of four girls, an outgoing Dad and one chatty Mother she doesn't get a lot of speaking opportunities. I have my suspicion that there may be more to her delay.  I'm no expert but I have had my fair share of parenting (at least four times in 9 years), fair share of talking (obvious to anyone who knows me or has ever sat in a room with me for 3 minutes) and working with small children with developmental delays (almost all my time at college....no, I actually worked for the school districts early intervention program, I wasn't referring to my fellow college students.) A few months ago at her 18 month well baby check up he said to bring her in in January if she still had no words.  We did a complete work up with the audiologist and she did wonderfully so no worries there.  I didn't take her back in January.  I decided to be the patient Mom just waiting for her when she is ready.  She has her two year well baby check up in a couple of weeks and I am anxious to hear what her pediatrician thinks.
So in the meantime I will continue to follow her to her chair as she giggles in anticipation of reading, we will cuddle and love and encourage the words, but I can't promise I won't sneak a chuckle next time she sticks her finger clear up her nostril when we ask her where her nose is.  Besides, she managed to purchase a game package on my cell phone for $4.99 this week, how delayed can she be?
Oh, that crinkly nosed smile...I could eat her, every last bit.
 Her new swim suit...she loves it so.  She kept twirling and playing with the skirt when I put it on her.

 Sometimes she does funny things like stands like this while she is waiting for something.  She is just cute like that. (And sometimes no matter what I do, I cannot rotate a picture.)

We all remember this one, no?

Despite the fact that she accidentally pooped in the potty last week and has the whole "hold your crotch and bounce while looking longingly at me" thing down, I don't think she knows what you are supposed to do when sitting there.  Besides, I don't believe in truly potty training a child until they come up to me, rub my arm gently and say "Mother, if you don't mind, I do believe I am ready to put away the diapers and start using the restroom like a civilized person.  Thank you for all those times you lovingly cleaned my bottom but your services are no longer needed." That's when you know they are ready.   Besides, as her mother, I am totally entitled to post pictures like this on my blog.

My other favorite thing that Hazel does is this.  You know how babies do their whole "I don't know" shoulder shrug and head shaking? Instead of her intonation going up, go ahead, shrug your shoulders and say "I don't know" in an upward pitch--she says it in a downward pitch...as if to say "I don't know, what are you asking me for" while putting her chin down and to the side while casting just her eyeballs up.  It's hilarious.

I should have waited to do a post entirely dedicated to her since her birthday is right around the corner...but I think I will say only nice things about her in that one.

13 comments:

JJ said...

First off, that girl is A-Dorable! I need to live by you so I can enjoy all those fascinating and sweet personalities.

Second, I guess that's why I've had a bit of trouble with potty-training. It makes a lot of sense to wait until they actually ask for it.

Natalie Rose said...

I have the same potty training belief...but Rhett just turned four and I can't take it any longer. The child must be prodded, I'm afraid. We have begun, but it will be a long journey.

I love the pink stripey hat...Nya had that same hat when she was that age and I just came across it when pulling out her old clothes for my Hazel. Fond memories of that hat...we were in Groton at the time she wore it too, ironically.

I noticed something very early on with Nya too. We're still (she just turned eight) working on how best to help her with her speech. That is just one element in the spectrum of her learning delays, but I know she will do just fine. She may be a year or so behind her peers right now, but when she's 25, will that really matter? Plus, the girl can put together an outfit better than most adults. As long as she can read and figure out a 20% discount, she'll be FINE. Does anything else really matter? :o)

Rhett has a speech delay too, but his is more laziness, I think. He has no other signs of delay (other than the whole potty-training thing). I've had him tested and he doesn't qualify for any "help" because he is at or above his age level. I just keep waiting for him to come into his own. That boy is obstinate.

Sorry, for the long post...should have sent an email, but I appreciated what you wrote. Made me feel better about my own opinions. -Natalie

Vee said...

She is such an adorable little girl. I love that last picture.

Lucky Mommy said...

She is gorgeous, like all of your girls, and maybe she just doesn't need to talk as much as your other girls. She's got plenty of personality, though! Give us a report after her 2 year check up! As for the potty training, I think your advice sounds great.

Charlotte said...

I'm sure she'll be fine. Paper bagged heads will be all the style in no time and she'll look like a revolutionary.

Berly said...

Thanks for the update. I am about to update my blog on my little Olie - Nicole. And reading your blog, helped me remember we all have these sweet little kiddos with their own timing on things. Let me know how the 2 year check goes...and follow your instincts. I also majored in Child Development and that has helped me ALOT with Nicole. Keep an eye out for the post on Nicole.

Brett and Amy said...

She could walk around eating trash, with her finger trying to find her nose through the paper bag, and still be the most darling little girl. Only something special could pull that off with pulchritude. I love her sparkly eyes, crinkly nosed smile and those cheeks....those cheeks....mmmmm. And LOVE that last pic.

Suzie Petunia said...

Oh dear me... I miss that girl tons. And you, too.

Suzie Petunia said...

Oh, and Alice came up to me last weekend and said EXACTLY what you wrote about being potty trained. And now she is!

OK, it didn't happen exactly that way. But I did make her think it was all her idea.

Abby said...

I NEEEED HER! I need hugs and smiles and recognition from her. I won't even ask her to talk...just love me. And I can't handle how cute her swimsuit is! And with the glasses?? Stop it!

Julie said...

She is precious! How do you stand it? Happy almost birthday to her and hoping all is well!

mo said...

My personal take on the situation with Hazel-Basil is that she just doesn't have anything important to say yet. One of these days she will all of a sudden say, "Excuse me, but the stove is on fire." It's either that or she just can't get a word in edgewise with five other females in the house! I'll be waiting to hear what your pediatrician says...he may agree with me.

Lauren said...

What a cute girl! I'm glad to know I'm not the only one with that philosophy about potty-training. I keep waiting for my 3 year old little boy to decide to use the potty. I tell him every day how much fun it is, but he doesn't seem to believe me. In his own time, I suppose.