I have a terrible mother confession...

Here is my confession.  I think I am leading my children on.  Not really.  But I kinda am.  Let me explain.
They want pets, bad.  They have been asking for a dog almost daily for years.  Clark made the deal with them, on more than one occasion, that all they had to do was keep their rooms clean for two straight weeks and we would go out and get a dog.  I just about had a heart attack until I realized only 24 hours into it that it was quite the impossible task.  They still haven't managed to accomplish that one.  So this week Mia came to me with a deal: They would all be terrifically nice to each other, obedient to us with bright, shining attitudes while keeping their rooms clean for two entire months.  In my most most non sarcastic ecstatic voice I may or may not have promised each person their very own pet of their choosing if they could accomplish that.  What makes me feel like I am leading them on is that I know it could never happen.  And yet, they have been the most perfect angels for the last 48 hours.  Like, scary perfect.  As in, if anyone says "yes Mommy" one more time I might pull my hair out.  I keep thinking, "yes!" THIS is the family I always dreamed of and yet I have guilt every time they ask a question about litter boxes and breeds.  At this point the tally is at one dog, two cats, a hamster, a bunny maybe and some fish.  I don't know what is worse, the endless questions and listening to them plan out every last detail, or the guilt that it is out of their grasp.
On one hand, I hope they surprise us.  I would love if they could keep this up so consistently.  We have been trying to convince them that by the end of this little exercise they will have the satisfaction of not just animals, but happiness.  For the first time in a long time, that concept seems to be hitting home.  I have seen more love, kindness, willingness, patience, long suffering and joy in the last 48 hours with every daughter that I can only hope and pray they make it last a while.
On the other hand, heaven help us if they do.

In the meanwhile, the eternal game of catch-up continues.

Jonah had his first official time out.  I'm sure there will be many, many, many more.

Then we celebrated our May 1st baby.  Don't let this picture fool you, they were all bright eyed and bushy tailed, bursting with energy and ready to start Abby's birthday off with a bang.  Or not.  At least Hazel was interested.  I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that there is food on that tray.

 This is how I will always remember my lil Babs.  Happy, smiling, dimpled.

 She still has a talent for making people happy.

 I should get mother of the year.  I didn't try to convince her to eat out for her birthday dinner (at least not very hard.)  AND when she requested little smokies and mashed potatoes, I created this beauty.  It's a hedgehog in case you were wondering. After this picture I changed its eyes to peas because the tomatoes were scary.

 I was inspired by this little masterpiece by my mother when I was young.  Aw, look how happy her hedgehog was.  Mine looks like its choking on its own tongue.

My precious, special child.

 We attending Hazel's Kindergarten Texas program.  She was darling and adorable and their songs made me smile the whole while.  Note to self: go back and watch the video of the song "He Came From Texas On A Big White Horse" where the boys would sing a stanza and the girls repeated it in a high voice while bouncing a hip and waving a hand in the air.  Priceless bit of history.

Just like the bluebonnets I was excited for another fun thing to do in Houston that comes around each May.  The Houston Art Car Parade - I have been waiting to go back again since we lived here and discovered it 9 years ago.  I wish I could say it hasn't slipped in the creepy people factor a little. For the most part, still a great time, even though it was waaaarrrrm and there were waaaaayyy too many middle aged ladies wearing animal print and dancing on party buses.

Ah, Mother's Day.

You win some, you lose some.

This year was a win! But let me enlighten you as to why - I had a good attitude.  Thank you, thank you very much, 'pat' 'pat' 'pat' (that's the sound of me patting myself on the back, just in case you were wondering.)  Oy, can I just state the obvious again that attitude makes all the difference?  I recognize that sometimes you just wake up on the wrong side of the bed, even on Mother's Day.  The day was far from a Pinterest definition of perfect, but my family served me and doted on me and I felt loved and happy.

The day started with breakfast and flowers while I read cards from everyone out loud and tried not to cry at each and every one of them.

 I laid in bed for quite some time wondering why I couldn't smell my breakfast cooking until Clark came in and reminded me that I was supposed to make my request.  You see, I had purchased two different options depending on what mood I was in that morning and I forgot to alert him as to my choice.  I had also bought several bouquets of flowers for women in our family and told him to "surprise me" with which one I should have.  Yellow roses, though I recently found out send a horrible message in flower language (stinkin' book learning!) was a perfect flower simply because they were part of our wedding.  Good choice Clarky Pants.

 Mmm, I chose wisely.  Clark sure knows how to make delicious scrambly eggs.

 I was treated to foot rubs and complimentary ear cleaning.  Not sure about that one but I was accepting all offers put on the table.

 In short, these are the people that I love and that make my life absolutely filled to the brim with joy.

They make my days beautiful.

Annnnd, until we have another baby or get a dog, I will post pictures of my youngest because he is cute.  And that's that.

Easter and stuff.

 Several years ago my Megan in law introduced the idea of "Funny Bunny Day".  Funny Bunny Day is the day before Easter where you do all the fun stuff so that Easter Sunday can be more about the actual reason we celebrate Easter.  I liked it so much we have done it ever since.  This year was somewhat haphazardly thrown together at the last minute because Grandma and Grandpa and the older kids were all attending Youth Conference until that afternoon.  But since I had totally and completely neglected to dye eggs with the kids or even coordinate some kind of Easter day frock finery, we had to pull something together on Saturday no matter what. 

 We did dinner and an egg hunt at our house with some of the cousins.  I have a little problem with Easter induced amnesia and I forget every single year it we have plastic eggs or not, so I buy some, every year.  Needless to say, even though we had almost a dozen kids running around, their baskets and buckets were overflowing.  And since our backyard is kind of on the smallish side, it looked like someone had just sneezed plastic eggs all over the place.  They were in plain sight and laying about every 12 inches on the grass.  It was spectacular slaughter.

 I am appreciating our yard here in Texas for all sorts of reasons; grateful that in the typical houses-built-on-top-of-each-other scheme of things we have the rare-ish blessing of no houses behind us so it feels more private than it could.  It's lovely but I have to forget about our last backyard.  Let's just reminisce for a moment, shall we?

 Snow, another thing I actually miss.  I just loved the solitude of our place in Virginia.  Again, I really do like our neighborhood here in Texas (and I love our home) but I don't really like being so close to my neighbors that I can hear their dog breathing through the fence or have to worry about whether or not Jimmy across the street is wearing a shirt today or not.
Just sayin.
Clark and I want land.  Not a ton, just enough.  But I will get to that more, later.

Back to Texas.  It is a little bit more of a challenge to find outtings here than it has been in some of the other places we have lived.  Points of interest are not quite so obvious.  You can find them, you just have to look.  Going to frolick in the Bluebonnets is something not to miss each Spring.  We were a little late in the season this year but a few weeks ago we took a short jaunt to Brenham and played at the Antique Rose Emporium which is a beautiful nursery with oodles of space to wander.

We had our darling little friend, Olivia staying with us for a couple of days so we dragged her along.  She fits in rather nicely, I'd say.

 We may have missed the height of the Bluebonnets, but we found plenty of other photo ops.

 With a tear in my eye, I'd say that my kids have rather mastered the art of the jumping picture.  Bravo!

 They frolicked some more, until they started itching.

 And sometimes I just take them in, like oxygen to my Mommy soul.  They are sweet.  And when I see them being together and enjoying it, my Mommy heart could just melt and seep right out of my body, all over the field of wilting Bluebonnets.

 This picture has nothing to do with anything except to document that as a mother of four daughters, I regularly have to buy replacement hair elastics.  I'm not joking, nearly every other month I buy hair elastics and bobby pins and this is why.  This load was confiscated from everyone's wrists in one evening.  They feel a need to carry spares everywhere they go, for no reason at all.  They carry them around until they lose them.  And then I buy more because I am a sucker for a tidy fontanelle.

I am squeezing every single minute of enjoyment out of these beautiful days.  Even though we may not have a distinct four seasons, we get a sampling of chilly to hot.  The fall and Spring are amazing here.  The weather has been perfect as of late.  I am savoring it because I am a little terrified of summer.  Summer is hot, and I sweat a lot.

 So back to the bit about wanting land.  There are lots of options here, near where we live, I just know it.  We live in a cloistered little neighborhood but just 10 minutes down the road you hit country.  The biggest trick is getting the land you want while keeping our kids in the schools we desire.  For Family Home Evening a couple of weeks ago, we pestered some friends of ours to let us come hang out on their track of land.  Even though they are only 15 minutes away, their lot could not be more different.  It is quiet.  It is beautiful.  They have bunnies, baby goats and a beautiful garden.

 And a wheelbarrow.

The kids played a rousing game of Red Rover.  It gives me anxiety as a parent to watch - I was just waiting with my fingers gripping the car keys, guessing which one I was going to have to drive to the emergency room with a broken arm.  Especially when the gaggle ganged up on the two smallest girls who ended up by themselves until Uncle Mike took pity and brought them back from certain annihilation.

 We will find our land.  Then someday, we can have our cake and eat it too.  Let's just hope it's before all the kids grow up and leave home and we are left to do all the farm chores by ourselves.  I just want to wear a full apron and rubber boots.  I can't do that here or neighbor Jimmy might just think I've lost it, and we wouldn't want that.

We'll end with yet another hidden talent of mine - pulling teeth.  I have pulled many a teeth in my day.  Hazel came to me with a very wiggly tooth, ripe for the taking.  

I asked if she wanted me to get it out.

(I am a very committed tooth extractor-if I feel it is wiggly enough, by golly, I will get it out on one go of it.)

I did.

She cried.

There was blood.

 But then she quickly got over it and was ecstatic at having lost her first tooth.

In my defense, the bagel started it.

Go here and here.

My good friend Kristen invited me to participate in her week long Mother's Day celebration and happily obliged since I love talking about my family.  You can go here to read it, or just read here where it is less fancy looking :)

And then pop over here, to read about my sister Abby who presented at her kids' school for Career Day.  I admire her and love how she did her presentation.

Yay for Moms.  Moms are great, and I love them.

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Now to hear from my friend Emily! She has been one of my closest friends from high school to present day. With cross country moves, and a gaggle of kids between us, we’ve managed to see each other about once a year.

{More images of their cute family HERE as well as a timeline of pics of us throughout the years}

She’s filled with much wisdom.  I’ve always admired her mom, how she found time for creativity, while raising 7 delightful children, so she’s going to share some wisdom with us today that she’s learned from her mom!

(I added some BOLD text to highlight where I felt stirred with an “amen” and links where I felt some not of our faith may have further inquiry.)

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My parents were active in the {Mormon} church.  They showed us by example that we were a family that showed up.  It’s something that I have felt impressed by the importance of in my own family.  We go.  We go to all of our meetings, to activities, to {early morning religious} seminary.  They had expectations that we would do these things because those actions show a commitment and obedience to something important.  We read the scriptures together.  We had family home evening.  We just spent time together and I loved it.  Just playing and being together continues to be my most favorite thing to do with my family.  I remember not only family prayer each night but their encouragement to say our own personal prayers.  I remember them each kneeling beside us at night as we said our personal prayers by our bed.  I know that as a mother of five bedtime exhausts me.  By the time family prayer is done I want them to their rooms and  go to sleep, so I know that going to check on each of 7 children by the end of the day was tiring but important to them to teach and reinforce the importance of a personal relationship with our Father in Heaven.

My Mom is very creative!! It has rubbed off on her daughters as we each feel great validation and satisfaction in creating.  My Mom was originally an art major in college.  I remember paintings she did when I was very small and thinking she was the best artist I had ever seen.  Our house was tastefully decorated.  Her talents were used time and time again in church callings, school projects and favors for people.  Passing her a piece of paper during church was the best because her drawings were so delightfully perfect in my mind.  I still love her style and ability to create things that are cute and amazing.

I also love that my parents had a sense of humor.  They knew when it was appropriate to be silly and fun and when it was time to be serious.  My siblings and I enjoy the same things as my parents so it is easy to spend time with them both growing up and now as adults.  They appreciate the arts and good literature as well as a good show or movie.  My Mom can make me laugh.  One picture that I included was a tea party she set up for me and my younger brother and sister when I was about 4.

We were the youngest of 7 so you can imagine what the first part of her day had entailed – getting kids up and out the door to school.  I’m sure she always had a list of things to accomplish during the day and yet I remember her taking the time to spend time with us or do special things on occasion that made us feel special and happy.  But I also love that they didn’t spoil us with attention constantly.  I think kids these days have the expectation that they have to be entertained all the time.  My Mom could send us out the door to play for hours on our own and it fostered in us a creativity and ability to find our own fun.

I love the scripture in Doctrine & Covenants 64:33
Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work.  And out of small things proceedeth that which is great.

As mothers we spend a great majority of our time doing things – cleaning up, laundry, meals, shopping, etc.  I need the reminder that I am not doing a tedious work each day but those actions are how I am able to serve my family.  It makes me more grateful each day for the opportunity to be a mother.  I have also been blessed with the perspective that this time is fleeting.  Each moment is so quickly here and gone, for better or worse.  When its hard I remind myself that this won’t last forever and soon it will be gone and different.  But it’s the same reminder when times are wonderful – these times and moments won’t last forever.  Savor them, drink them in.  It has helped me enjoy each and every stage.  Having gratitude for each time in my life has ensured that I have no regrets.  I won’t look back and wish that my children were small again.  I will be able to look back with fondness and joy while also having an appreciation and love for the present.

My mother showed faith and confidence in her husband and children.  We moved several times while I was growing up.  That means that several times she to had to pick up and move her home, her own friends and opportunities as well as deal with 7 children making that same adjustment (kids spanning 12 years.) I never heard her complain.  It was an amazing example to look to when as a married woman I continued to move and relocate time and time again.  I love the story of my paternal grandmother, upon moving away from family and the comforts of their closeness, as a young married woman herself walking into a new, unfamiliar apartment that was not as nice as where they were coming from.  She promptly turned around and walked out but returned moments later with a sprig of flowers from a bush outside, placed them in a jar and set it on the mantel and declared “there, now we are home”.

I cringe when I hear mothers yelling at their children.  I imagine how the Savior would interact with a child and it helps me maintain control.  I distinctly remember what it felt like to be a child and to interact with adults.  Being yelled at was crushing to me and so when I see a parent raise their voice or belittle their child with a lack of patience, it breaks my heart.  I understand losing your temper.  I have 5 children.  It happens.  But over the years I have learned to be better at maintaining control over my emotions when dealing with them.  It is so much more effective to be calm and controlled and intentional.

I think the greatest way my mother has influenced me is simple by example.  It’s difficult to remember all of the details of what life was like when I was growing up but I look up to my Mom as someone who exemplified strength, sacrifice, perspective, intention, peace, dedication and love for where she put her attention and energy both at home and church.

Something that I see in both my mother and my grandmother (her own mother) is sacrifice.  My Mom just shared this story of her mother in the recent Women’s Conference about how she walked to church every week by herself because her parents weren’t active.  She was young and yet made the effort for years to go by herself.  When she was a young woman she had decided that she wasn’t going to go anymore but her father who had watched her sacrifice for something so important to her for so long, offered to go with her.  So not only did she stay strong, but her example brought her father back into the church.

I think often, about how my own mother has sacrificed things all along the way.  We need to be reminded sometimes that sacrifice doesn’t just mean giving something up that you want, but it is giving selflessly for something of great value.  My mother put aside her formal education for 30 years to raise a family and be there for them.  She served alongside my Dad as a mission president’s wife in a foreign country at the young age of 25, with four (and then five) small children.  She has been a seminary teacher for many, many years.  I would say sacrificing time to prepare and sleep in the early morning is definitely a sacrifice, especially since the blessing was being able to teach most of her own children at least one year in seminary.  What a blessing it has been for me to be cared for not only in the physical sense as she has come to my rescue time and time again not only as a child but as an adult in college when I had mono, and each time I have had a baby she has come to serve and pamper.  I have been blessed and nurtured spiritually through her teachings and example at home, as well as having her as a leader in church in seminary, young womens, girls camp, and Sunday school.

The sacrifice and service continues! Then she set aside more of being near her children and grandchildren to serve alongside my Dad once more as a temple matron in Sweden.  She has recognized that with each of these sacrifices comes unimaginable blessings and experiences.  I hope that I can have her perspective and faith in the Lord’s plan and timing.  She doesn’t waiver in making choices that are right and good.  There have been so many times in my life that I wish I could call (and have tried!) to ask my parents to just tell me what I should do but they don’t.  They show faith in their children to follow that formula as well.  They show confidence in us to make a decision according to our own faith and testimony in our Heavenly Father and his plan for us.