Abby's "Underwear Ball" How-To:

So when I was cleaning out the girls closet the other day I came across something heavy that made a loud 'thud' when I threw it out into their room. So I asked Abby for a tutorial.


"It's very easy. First, you just put all undies on your head, as many as you can find. Then you can take it off and it's like a ball"...that weighs five pounds.


You might think "well heavens, with all that underwear being used for projects like that, what have they been wearing? I have four girls and approximately 436 pair of assorted "unders" as we like to call them. I (like to) think they were all clean for this little activity.

I just love when the girls get into their arts and crafts.

Bountious.

Fried green tomatoes.

This was all in yesterday's harvest alone...we had a most delicious lunch! It has been really fun to have a garden this year...and even though half of our bell pepper plants turned out to be mislabeled hot peppers, we'll figure out something to do with them too (besides daring each other to eat them right off the plant.)

Chapter 1...I am born.

I love birthdays, I mean, who wouldn't? First thing this morning (actually second thing...first thing was telling Mia, who was laying in bed next to me at 6:15am, to stop unwrapping the piece of candy that she was about to eat...) I laid in my bed and called for my children to come sing me Happy Birthday...then I closed my eyes and snuggled for a few minutes before cracking the whip to get everyone ready for church. I told them that my one birthday wish was that they would be nice to each other, all day. It almost happened. Close enough.
My family and friends have showered me with packages this week...boxes, treats, edible deliveries and fun trinkets. One package that came this week all the way from Texas had a cute gift from my own daughters...lovingly picked up, wrapped and sent by their helpful aunt. Haley called her last week, concerned about the fact that she had no money and couldn't drive. So my sister in law helped them out. I even got a phone call last night at 12:03 am from my fun friend who wanted to be the first to wish me well. And I am sitting here now with my belly absolutely full and aching from delicious food and wonderful company. She even let me make requests for what I wanted to eat. The sparkling grape juice was a bonus.
Thank you to all of you gift shower-ers and well wishers on blogs, facebook, e mail, mail and by person!!

I feel loved.
I love birthdays.

And 31? I'm totally up for it.

"I'd kiss you, but I just washed my hair..."

I am really grateful for my kids. You know how you always LOVE your kids but some days it feels difficult to LIKE them? Today I LOVED them AND LIKED them. They are beautiful and I enjoy their company. They make me really, really happy...deep down inside.
I am grateful for my kids.

Early Retirement...

While talking to my sister today and discussing awesome babysitters, I had a plan. Did you ever read a Babysitter's Club book? I realized that in about 6 or 7 more years, I am going to have my own little agency of babysitters. I will begin now training them to believe that it is their life's destiny to support their family....and BOOM! in 7 years, Clark retires, we hire out our daughters to watch other people's kids and live off their hard work.
Sounds like a good plan to me...I'll take bookings early with a small deposit.

That's veeery interesting...'night slothead.

The Brave Little Toaster....worth seeing at least once if only to hear that line where a lamp is telling the toaster 'good night'...and the part where Blankie bursts into tears at the top of the stairs.

I finally remembered my camera enough times to document the weekly goings on of our summer. We have loved our schedule (I use that term loosely...it's more like guidelines lest we become overly bored.) However, it is making the summer simply fly by, and that makes me sad. We waited so long for summer to get here. We are thoroughly enjoying the amazing weather and all that we have at our fingertips with the always-present option to stay in our pj's and do nothing much at all.
Each day we had a plan or at least an option of something to do. It gets us out of the house. But most of our days also have to include quiet time, reading time, tidying time and occasionally a session of "Busy Bee School" (inspired by Amy of course) to do workbooks and make sure that our brains and skills have not been completely turned to mush. I am speaking in very ideal terms of course...sometimes I lay in bed and allow my oldest daughter to make everyone (including myself) breakfast...and then we lay around some more and maybe jump on the trampoline, and then we just keep laying around or skip from one activity to another until it's time to stand out on the front porch, take some deep breaths of real air, then go back inside where we change into fresh pajamas and get ready for bed....after all, it is summer vacation.

Library Day-The girls love going to the library and picking their books for the week. The three oldest are participating in the library's summer reading program where they get prizes for reading each week and answering questions in their little program booklet. Nothin like stickers, tattoos and bookmarks to totally make their day.

Free Movie Day-I finally discovered only last week, what it takes to sit through an entire movie without taking Hazel out....or maybe it was a fluke. In any case, the girls love this one (and so does my bank account seeing as how a trip to the movies these days can require taking out a small loan.)

Beach Day. We go rain or shine. We love the Later's beach...and the Later's for lending it to all of us each week. There are always a plethora of kids, fun, sand, splashing, spraying, snacks and community Popsicles....and even though this means that we leave a snail trail of sand and water from their back door all the way to the bathroom, we love going!!

Adventure/Outing Day. We use this day to go explore somewhere new (or somewhere old.) Museums, parks, historical sites, etc. sometimes with friends, sometimes on our own.

Freebee day, where we usually end up somewhere that we have passes to...bowling, the aquarium or zoo...or just a park nearby. Friday nights is also our pajama party night...we roll out the blankets, pick a good flick and eat dinner, picnic style in front of our movie.

SATURDAY is our beloved (and necessary) cleaning day. It's also our day at home to just hang out or run little errands or maybe do something interesting that we have caught wind of.

SUNDAY. Our day of rest. We go to church, we nap, we play, we walk, we eat...a day to truly slow down and enjoy one another's company.
I am tired...mostly a good kind of tired...
My kids are without their Dad a lot this year, more than ever before (except for that six months he did last year of course...and we have another one of those headed our way.) My Megan-in-law recently pointed out to me that the girls will have fond memories of this time with their Mom. That statement, though very sweet sentiments, left me feeling unsure that that was what they were feeling. So I made up my mind to have fun this summer, to create traditions and customs and memories, lots of good memories.
I hope they will remember it.
I hope that even if they don't remember exactly what we did, they will remember having fun with their Mom and their sisters; that we did things together, that we worked together, and played together, and missed Dad together, and welcomed him home again together, and spent time loving being with each other.
That is the goal. So check back (with me or their therapist) in 5 to 10 and we'll see how I did.

The 5 Stages of Grieving...AKA "Saturday Chores"

It is a sad fact that my poor, sweet, innocent children have to go through this every single week (and most days in between, 'gasp!') But (nearly) every Saturday we see the same thing. There is nothing that can be done but be patient through this process...it will eventually end and the jobs will get done.

Stage #1

Denial-"this can't be happening to me", looking for ways out of it, continuing on in current activity pretending that it is not so. No crying. Not accepting or even acknowledging the task.

Stage #2

Anger-"why me?", feelings of wanting to fight back or get even with the parent, anger at the parent, blaming them for being just awful in general. In this stage, there is potential for throwing and kicking things, and actually making a bigger mess for them to clean up. (This stage is optional although it can last through the next two stages...however, they must acknowledge that if they do indeed stay angry, it will increase their number of chores in the end.)

Stage #3

Bargaining-bargaining often takes place before the tasking. Attempting to make deals with the parent, or attempting to make deals with each other and outsiders. Begging, wishing, praying for them to change their mind. This may also include bribery for a sister to complete their sister's task with the promise of large amounts of candy or money that 'said' sister does not really have.

Stage #4

Depression-overwhelming feelings of hopelessness, frustration, bitterness, self pity, mourning loss of free time as well as the hopes, dreams and plans for the future. Feeling lack of control, feeling numb. Perhaps feeling like hurting someone (typically the nearest sister.) This stage typically includes weeping, waling and gnashing of teeth and can go on for anywhere from 10 minutes to 3 hours. This also has the potential to make a bigger mess. However, on occasion this stage can also be referred to as "delusion"...a severe distraction from the task at hand when "cleaning" actually turns into a game that they forgot all about and keeps them busy for an hour and a half before they are gently reminded what they are supposed to be doing.

Stage #5

Acceptance-there is a difference between resignation and acceptance. You have to accept the tasking, not just try to bear it quietly. Realization that it has to get done and that the parent is not just trying to ruin their lives. Finding the good that can come out of the pain of working hard, finding comfort and healing. Our goals turn toward personal growth. Appreciating their clean room and feeling amazing for what they accomplished.

Occasionally we get chores done without any of the above...everyone is happy and works together quickly to move onto other things. But really, where's the fun in that?

Thank you for your performance girls...working with you is always a pleasure.

"My voice is my passport...verify me."

-Werner Brandice, Sneakers

Whether you believe it or not, I am an optimist. Usually when I am being negative it can be blamed on one of two things, sarcasm or good old fashioned hormones...or fatigue (OK, that was three things, so sue me.) Give me any situation and I will show you the silver lining or at least try to bring a little humor into your hum drum life. If you haven't seen this side of me, dig beyond my daily correspondence, it's there.
I love humor....someone's sense of humor can absolutely make or break it for me. My husband is hilarious and silly. So is the rest of my family...my siblings are some of the funniest people I know and thinking about them makes me happy. I have such silly pictures of my parents that I wouldn't dare post on the internet for fear of tarnishing their credibility as upstanding, responsible citizens...which they TOTALLY are...they just also happen to be really funny too. Not to leave out my in-laws either...I mean, my husband wouldn't have turned out so funny if they weren't entertaining as well. And as I like to say, my kids are funnier than my husband and me combined which is ironic because they are my husband and me combined.
I realized just yesterday, as I lifted up my daughter to smell her rear end, that I really find my life quite humorous. And that is a good thing. Not to say that I make light of my life, but I can almost always find the humor in it if I try.
I recently bought a tin plaque to hang in my kitchen where I will see it everyday. It's a quote by Abraham Lincoln that says "Most people are as happy as they make up their mind to be." I believe that and though I have spent many hours, days and sometimes weeks wallowing in a problem, I have come to truly believe this. It is tough, and sometimes I just plumb don't wanna be happy...but the ultimate end is that we get to choose our attitude. I have always understood quite clearly that we don't always get to choose what is happening in our lives, but we ALWAYS get to choose how to react to it (at least after an appropriate amount of time to adjust.)
I have confidence that everything will be right in the end. I don't mean to imply that things will turn out so perfectly as we thought, but I know that

when the dust settles, life will go on.

I am grateful for that perspective. I like to think that is what real faith is...truly believing that all will be well no matter what exactly that is. I have known too many people that have come through unbelievably amazing things to not believe that philosophy to be true.
So take a moment to accentuate the positive, show some gratitude, tell a joke or laugh at yourself. You will feel better, I promise. (But if by chance you need a little help, give me a call and I'll tell you about the time and circumstance in which I had to call my sister to come over to my house at 9:00 at night to help me remove my daughter's nightgown from my body where it was cutting off the flow of blood to my arms. Good times.)

Don't be too confused...this is not my child, but it WAS indeed our naughty spot...available to any child or parent in need.

Abby with her cousins circa 2006.

Because they make me laugh.

Niagara Falls, Franky Angel...

2008

2008

2006

2006

2006

When I got out our enormous and archaic video camera to tape the girls' play, I realized that it had been a while since I have actually used it. I am such in the habit of using our little digital to do snipits that I don't bother pullin out the big guns to tape something of an extended nature...who really needs to see Christmas morning from beginning to end, or 16 hours of labor?...I mean, typically I have better things to do, like focusing on the task of using my shampoo and conditioner at the exact same rate so that they run out at precisely the same moment.
I decided that before I could put the camera away again for another 6 months I must organize and properly label the tapes. We bought the camera when our oldest was 6 months old...about the time that she was actually doing noteworthy things...you know, like solving advanced algebraic equations and walking backwards on her hands down the stairs. We have hours of seemingly tedious video that I have convinced myself we will watch someday when we are old and bored...or maybe when we are so old that we don't remember anyone that we are related to.
I have come to the conclusion that I am sentimental about moments, people and memories, not really things. I am a champ at throwing things away. With the exception of a few choice objects (ie wedding rings, my blue blanky and shriveled up umbilical cords) I really am not attached to many things. Pictures are priceless....journal/blog entries really please me the most, but things? Not so much.
So I am drawing out this organizational process (much like this whole explanation) so that I can savor our memories. My intent was to watch the tapes in fast forward to simply bullet each item on the tape...but so far I am 3/4 of the way done, have watched four labor and deliveries, two children learning to ride a bike, many Christmas mornings, more birthdays than I can count and a few dance-offs in the family room...and one video of Clark where he may or may not have been playing human shuffle board with our children in our front entryway. Heck, I figure while I am ambling down memory lane this week I might as well watch all of these slide shows and videos I have sitting in front of me on the desk too. I pop truffles from their hiding place in my nightstand (that my girls have not figured out opens) in between trips to the bathroom to retrieve more squares of toilet paper to wipe away my tears of sentimentality.
I love my life.
It has not been awesome every single step of the way but I sure love looking back and feeling blessed beyond words for the people I have met, the experiences that I have had and the things that I have learned. I am a sucker for a song with sentimental lyrics and black and white photographs of my family. So until this project is finished, I am going to take my time, pop a few more truffles and let the tears and snot flow freely.

2007

1998 (right after Clark proposed)

2007

2009

2005