Teenagers...

This is the conversation I just had with the two year old.

ME: Mi Mi, where are your clothes? (she was standing next to me in her underwear.)
MI MI: I don't like my clothes.
ME: Why not?
MI MI: Because I hate them.
ME: Why do you hate them?
MI MI: Because I don't like them.

Enough said. I guess I'll just have to deal with the two year old in underwear. I mean, how do you argue with that kind of logic?

Return. Tab.

Here's the scoop...I'm pretending that they are all separate posts but really they are not. Do you feel deceived?

Never Eat Soggy Waffles (aka North East South West)
My house faces the wrong way. I don't even know which direction it faces. It just feels wrong.

We did the beach.
It's really been a beachy kind of summer. We were going once or twice a week there for a while. And then we discovered a gem of a beach that it right in our friend's backyard...now we can't seem to go anywhere else. They have sandbars that come completely out of the water making it an especially fun time for the littles. We tried to have some fun with the dead marine life but really I just need a better camera.





Romancing the Stone...a young stone's journey Part II
Remember all those posts ago when I introduced our baby boy (cleverly disguised as a kidney stone?). I never passed it...it was quite stuck. So finally today they went in and blasted it...kind of like in the movie Armageddon when they blew the huge asteroid to pieces before it hurtled into the Earth's atmosphere. I actually looked forward to today, as it were, because I got another "mandatory nap" (I've been heavily sedated now twice in the last month....zzzzzz.) I got to read my book while waiting at the hospital and then I got to sleep and not remember anything that they did. That's the way I like it. I was also informed after the procedure, that little "Rocky" was not just a mere 7mm but a whoppin 9mm (so don't judge me but I took my little ruler out into the yard to find a stone similar in size...since I'll never get to meet the little booger in his original state--I repeat: this is not the actual stone...its just one the same size.) No wonder he was stuck. He made a mess of things but at least now I can be on the mend...I'll just avoid going to the bathroom for the next few days...its not a pleasant experience. Now where did I put that Vicodin?

Quite worn out...but in a good way.
Sadie might not agree, but we're glad she is still here. We get her for a whole entire week more! And while we promise not to make her babysit anymore so I can have "mandatory naps" it was quite lucky that she was around.
We continue to wear ourselves out...or rather the little people...Sadie still looks fresh and dashing, don't you think? On Monday we hit Six Flags New England (without a camera...hence the crummy cell phone pictures.) Sadie braved a plethora of roller coaster rides and tried to drag the old fuddy duddies on as many with her as she could. I enjoy a good rush...helps relieve tension. I feel all loosey goosey after a roller coaster ride. Then I laughed as I watched my little girls drive off together in this one. And I thought, this is us in a few years. Haley (responsibly and very seriously) driving off to a church dance...our 17, 16 and 14 year old daughters...except for the model T car...hopefully they will be driving something a little more "modern". And I couldn't resist taking a picture of this sign outside the biggest/fastest roller coaster ride...what are they implying...is my nose too big? What was even funnier than this sign was all the sulking, rejected kids left behind by their taller companions as they ran off to ride.




Then yesterday we went to Newport, RI for a tour through the Marble House mansion and to hang out a bit with Noly Boly and his cute girl, Caroline. It was a fun time...especially when Mia had a "potty emergency" in the car and got stuck in the barf-bucket-converted-quickly-to-a-potty-bucket while still driving down the road. Man there are some rich people in the world.

Tonight its a party.
And right now I am sitting in a quiet house with girls all snuggled in their beds. I would be eating something yummy but we are actually out of ice cream (how in the world did that happen?) and I can't seem to swallow anything else...for some reason today's little procedure robbed me of any kind of saliva. Everything I eat is going down like dry sand. But I can actually finish putting my blog layout together while Sadie and Clark fill their heads with horribly disturbing images at the Batman movie...from what I have heard of the movie, we may have a 13 year old in our bed with us tonight. We tried to get her mother to disapprove but she pulled the old "its your decision" parenting bit. Darnit, I hate when they do that. We'll just call it a brother/sister bonding moment. (Sadie and I agreed that we hate when our parents gave us that line...just tell me what to do, it's so much easier!!! I mean that in a very respectful-and-I-agree-with-how-you-handled-that sort of way to my dear Mother in law. :)

Funny or very disturbing?

I don't know how many times I have to tell them...we don't eat the baby! Sheesh.
This was the game being played at the table last night after our delicious fruit smoothies (courtesy of Sadie.) I couldn't decide if it was really funny or really disgusting. I think it was a lot of both. How many baby feet fit in Clark's mouth? Right. I knew Clark was a foot person but this is ridiculous. In any case, Hazel didn't seem to mind (but the thought of my feet inside someone's mouth gave me the serious heeby jeebies.)
Didn't I tell you we need to get out more?

Hooray! a visitor!

We are being sufficiently entertained for the next two weeks by our dear Sadie. We love that Clark has a young sister that is so much fun to be around...and we are especially excited that she braved a solitary plane ride (plus one plane change) all by herself to come visit us all the way in Connecticut!! We are so glad...and we are keeping her busy. I've decided to post now so that in two weeks I don't post something that rivals my longest entry.
We picked her up on Wednesday in Boston and spent the day at the aquarium and Faneuil Hall. Then we picked up early the next morning and drove out to Palmyra, New York to see some church sites and catch the Hill Cumorah Pageant. (It looks like Abby needs to work on picking on someone her own size.)
The next day we drove a little bit further and visited Niagara Falls (which I can't seem to say without saying "Niagara Falls Franky Angel"...do you know what movie that is from?) It was a fun and very moist time. I found it ironic that while I was on the Maid of the Mist boat being sprayed in every direction with water that I was intentionally trying to keep my baby covered in all the appropriate places by plastic...doesn't that seem rather dangerous? But then I remembered that I had her out on a boat at the base of a very large waterfall and thought it probably wasn't the worst thing I've ever done with a newborn. In any case, aren't we a vision in blue plastic?
So Sadie has had to endure a lot of driving already and there will surely be more to come but we are looking forward to it!! And don't worry family, she is being well cared for and being fed lots of ice cream.
Stay tuned for more fun.
On a side note, I am getting sad that this onesie is getting too small. It just makes me giggle to see her in it.
One of Clark's and my favorite things to do after kids are in bed (besides watch TV, eat ice cream and popcorn and be adults) is playing games. We actually have a third game player to make things more interesting. Last night we played Life. I was having way too many moments of serious reflection during the game. Just for fun at the end of the game I filled my car with my real family pegs. I almost went out on a crazy limb and didn't buy house or car insurance in the game but then decided it was for the best. I need to live a little.

A happier place...

Living in a rental has its set of drawbacks. We have come to accept our place as "tenants" of a property where we do not get the last say. We also have accepted our place as the eyesore yard of the neighborhood. Apparently it is a well known fact among the neighbors that we live in "the rental". It has also become apparent to us, through talking to neighbors that the house was previously occupied by four bachelors in the Navy who loved to play with their air soft pellet guns both inside and outside the house (I am still sucking up a good number of little BBs every time I vacuum a month later...and you can see nicks made by those BBs in the siding of the house outside...right next to where Abby thought it would be fun to write her name in crayon...not to be confused with where she wrote her name in chalk in huge letters across the wall in the garage...or her name in slightly smaller letters in colored pencil on the window sill in her room...where is she getting all of these writing utensils?! Apparently she hasn't learned yet that writing your own name amid the graffiti is a dead giveaway to who did it.)
That being said, Clark and I submitted a plan to the owners a few weeks ago of some small changes that we would like to make in order to make the house a little happier looking...like some landscaping...any landscaping. This is a before picture...very dreary indeed.
I drew up a sketch and priced everything out (they foot the bill, we get to be happier when we pull in the driveway.) This was my submitted "sketch". OK, so I lack basic Auto CAD skills...but it got the point across.

And here is our finished product.
Now if we could just do something about the yard/grass...more affectionately referred to as "the prairie" because of its lack of actual blades of grass. It takes almost two hours to mow with a push mower and leaves you sore for days. Not to mention its a very unsatisfying job to mow a scant scatter of weeds and dandelion shutes. But at least we have picked out the majority of cigarette butts. And I'm holding out for the awesome black rocking chairs from Lowe's.
Clark even re-did the front step which was previously made up of six cinder blocks stacked on one another.

before after

Between a rock and a hard place.

On Wednesday afternoon I had a rather quick onset of discomfort in my lower back that turned rapidly into an excruciating pain in my lower back and side. After deciding that I couldn't spend the evening on my knees leaning on the couch I called Clark and made him come home from work early to take me to the hospital. I don't think I shall ever squint my eyes again in anger at an ER attending who shuttles people to the back out of turn on account of pain...I have decided there is nothing more miserable than sitting in the emergency room in lots and lots of pain with other people watching.
We were quite lucky though as a friend of ours just happens to work in the ER as a very friendly and accommodating doctor. Once we made our way back (after taking all the kids with us and waiting for Uncle Nolan to come save the day--he picked them up from the hospital, took them home, fed them and put them to bed!) I was taken care of quickly. And eventually, though not soon enough in my opinion, given drugs for the pain. By the way, being asked what my pain was on a scale of 1 to 10 was a more difficult question than normal seeing as how I had a baby just 3 months ago...how could I possible say 10? I typically give them two numbers...Uh, it's like an 8 or a 9...take your pick. Anyway, after a delightful little cat scan I was diagnosed with a kidney stone. A really big one.
I had decided that I would wait to post about this until the stone actually made it's ugly appearance...but after looking at pictures of them on the Internet I decided (for once in my blogging career) that it was too gross to actually show.
7 mm big...that's 1/4 inch for those of you without a ruler handy. That's awfully big in my opinion to have to travel where it travels. We decided though to make the best of it and consider this the son we may never have.
Clark and I haven't settled on a name yet- though we have been considering either Rocky or Stone Philips. My Dad thinks that we should wait and see what he looks like first. I apologized to Clark that I pulled him away from studying that night. He teased me that I was just hard pressed for a date and I decided that any date that ends with Morphine was well worth it.
I have exceeded my pain quota for the year. A baby and a kidney stone is too much...though now that I have said that out loud I might be inviting some kind of horrid bowel disease. I pledge that if I have to put my feet up in stirrups at a doctor's visit one more time this year I might kick someone, hard.
I really was grateful for the doctor that took care of me (I was quite a nuisance and called him at home before deciding to go into the ER...I bothered him with work before he had to go to work, not nice.) Not only did we get excellent medical care and friendly attention, but he offered me free post care babysitting from his wife. Now that's service!!

So after a follow up with a very nice, very old urologist yesterday..we, meaning he, decided to wait it out until Monday. So I will be taking plenty of vicodin (as needed of course) and medicine typically used for men with enlarged p*rostate....oh, and drinking lots and lots and lots of water. It's almost like being pregnant again...except that this "baby" won't be as cuddly. But maybe, just maybe, he'll grow up to be famous.

Shall we dance?...

Today at our house we've been doin' the old Scharman two step. One step forward...two steps back. I cleaned up so many spills today I lost count (and not all of them were beverages).
Breathe in. Breathe out.
Then Clark came home and cleaned out the garage. My To Do list is so long it has extended onto the next page. So even though I add two things to my list for every one thing that I accomplish, at least I can go look out in the garage and feel order.

you see this? i'm waving the white flag.

Directions: Take this post with a grain of salt...and then get back to me in three months.
We just got back from a delightful weekend trip to Washington D.C. to visit Spencer and Sho and celebrate the 4th of July in our Nation's capital. (Thanks to Spencer and Sho for the awesome pictures they took this weekend--I just wanted updated family pics to prove we had a new baby.) We drove there on Thursday night thus rendering the children unconscious for nearly the entire trip (an 8 hour drive once you add traffic through NYC and Philly, even when done in the middle of the night). Clark's brother Nolan (a good friend of my little bro) came with us and endured most of the trip with these little people in the back of the mini van...bonding with the girls. Needless to say, Nolan will not be having children anytime soon. But he was a champ right up through the last hour to home last night, holding the binky in the mouth of a crying baby and being poked by Abby's feet through his headrest, all to the chorus of cranky, whiny kids. I don't understand it...we invited him to stay for ice cream but he nimbly lept from our car into his truck upon pulling in the driveway. No doubt in a rush to get home to his bottle of Advil and quiet apartment.
It really was a fun trip. We watched the fireworks from the lawn on the mall right between the Washington monument and the reflecting pool. The show was spectacular...honestly the most amazing I've ever seen...even through the rain that we had on and off all day. The kids were troopers and loved it too! A totally good time.
HOWEVER, the point of this post is to share with all of you that I am losing my mind. Do you know that song "I'm going slightly mad?" I can't even remember who sings it though I can picture him in my head. But that shouldn't surprise you because I truly am losing all ability to recall basic information like what day it is, my children's names and how to form a coherent sentence. When I talk to people I feel like someone is poking a quadrant of my brain with a probe...my speech actually slurs on occasion while thinking of what words to use. It's a little embarrassing. This weekend in DC I experienced a first. We went to visit a cousin that I haven't seen in quite some time. We got to the door and said Hellos. It wasn't until I was going through my line up introducing little people that I realized we had left the baby in the car. Look, she was only 30 feet away and it had only been a minute but between three older kids and five adults that had gotten out of that car, she had been left behind. In my defense we were still trying to calm a fight between the older girls...someone bit someone else and Hazel had fallen into a peaceful and quiet sleep on the ride over. Then on Sunday I walked out the door and made it to church only to realize 25 minutes into the meeting that I had completely neglected to bring any kind of diaper bag. Nothing. Just forgot it altogether. Tonight while on the phone with my sister I started to tell her a story. I suppose I was filling in too many details and totally forgot the point of the story...right in the middle...even sitting here now I still can't remember, for the life of me, what I was going to tell her.

I was talking to my sister in law a few weeks ago and we were talking about this "transitional time" with a new baby. We were talking about how long it takes us to feel "normal" again. Do you know how long its been since I went the extra mile to make something really cute? or really fun? Case in point, Clark's Father's Day gift was given to him in a plastic Target bag. No cute card, nothing. I just don't have it in me. I've been in survival mode since Hazel was born. Granted we had a lot going on all at once. I have to keep reminding myself what I have said every time I've had a baby before--give it 6 months. It always takes me 6 months to get totally back into my groove. I can do the day to day stuff...I just don't have anything beyond that in me. So I keep telling myself over and over something that my sister in law's friend told her. It's great and very true. She said

"just put your hair in a ponytail. It's not your time. It will be your time again soon."

There is a light at the end of this greasy haired tunnel. Just try to avoid expecting anything cute or creative from me for another 2 months and 28 days. You can expect a lot more incoherent sentences, miscounted plates at the dinner table, keys locked in cars, half constructed blogging pages, random papers strewn about the house and little girls without shoes.

It's just not my time and that totally sucks.
(So my bro and sis in law took all the cool photos but I get to claim the one of Hazel...it makes me feel happier about this post.)

a whole gaggle of blogs

**OK I have to just get on with it and publish this one already because my blog reading list is growing by the day..too..many...blogs...to read...must feed...children...
This is really, no I mean really long but chances are if you are reading this, you'll be represented OR you'll find something new and interesting.

My name is Emily and I've been blogging for 3 years and 4 months (whoa, I rarely stick with anything that long.) I guess you could say I'm slightly obsessed. Don't judge me. How many of you live your day to day lives and use the phrase "oh, I should blog about this" more than once or twice during the week? I have really good reasons. I suck at keeping a journal. I have tried a couple of different times and I'm just no good. Besides, I can type way faster than I can write...and if my handwriting is messy then I stress about how yucky it looks and waste time wanting to redo it. I have a journal from when I was 8. I mention being hated by my siblings and parents and whining about how I wished I was never born. Charming. Then I have a couple of years in high school. It has some valuable information but sometimes my handwriting was messy so it bugs me to read it (can you tell that I focus too much unimportant things in my life? it's invites a lot of unnecessary stress. so sue me.)
So I have established a much better pattern of record keeping. It works for me. It's great. But it comes in two parts.
Every 2 or 3 months I sit down at the computer for a good 2 hours and write. It usually ends up being lots and lots of pages long. I pour my heart and soul into what I write. It is honest, raw, accurate and very personal. It's the kind of stuff that I hope no one reads until I am long gone and a few generations have passed. But it's therapeutic so I do it. There are some things that I see great value in remembering.
Then I blog. I blog a lot. About dumb things, and funny things, and unimportant and some important things. I include pictures that I love or that show something significant that I want to remember. Last year I had a blog book made and I plan to do that every year so that eventually I will have a library of blog books--a journal.
I love blogs because its a way that my family and friends stay connected...and that is important to me on a day to day basis when sometimes you don't feel connected to anything or anyone. It's a way to keep up on the goings on with parents, nieces and nephews that I adore and never see. I can read about a friend and learn from them and sympathize with them and know that I can identify with other individuals. I can be entertained by total strangers and learn something new and feel understood or validated. Over the years I have connected with a lot of people through their blogs. I hope it doesn't creep any of you out that I feel like your friend because I know you, in the internet sense. Here are the blogs that I read and who they are...at my last count there were over 50 (try not to be upset if I don't always comment...reading them all takes me a long time and I have to pace myself...)
In alphabetical order:
A Girl's Life-Pretty Daisy
my adorable niece. she doesn't like Zac Efron.
B & C
a really talented designer who happens to be beautiful...i knew her when she still wore embroidered baby diapers.
BECAUSE I SAID SO
a stranger with lots of kids who is just really really funny.
Chaos Contained
my awesome mother in law who is so cool she has her own blog.
Confessions of an A.D.D. non-typist...
my little sister who is really funny. she just had a happy surprise, read her blog.
Declarations of Sage Brush
a former college roommate and sister's really good friend...a pretty cool lady.
electric orange excentric
my cute sister in law in the Texas country.
espencerrr blogspot
my baby brother and his beautiful wife...they take great pictures and they really like our kids.
Eyre Blog
my little brother's friend from high school. she's really pretty and lives somewhere cool.
forecast calls for rain
a friend/neighbor from the good old days in Texas. sorry its private.
Gang Green Gazette
my grandparents. they are pretty much awesome but he is too busy writing real letters to us to blog.
Here and There
my beautiful french sister in law. they do a lot of very fun things...especially this summer.
Here We Go!
a long time navy friend who always has good ideas.
Hollywood Flakes
a stranger who is just really really funny and a great writer.
In between Days
another sister in law who I idolize...no pressure, she just really has it all together.
Insignificant
an old friend from middle school.
It's Yesterday Once More
a friend from Texas.
Kirkham's Korner
a friend/neighbor from Texas...happens to be the beautiful sister of the beautiful girl up above who lives in a cool place and is related to a new friend here in CT.
Kristen Duke Photography
one of my best friends from high school is my favorite photographer. she is very talented, and nice too.
little yellow boots
one of my most creative friends ever...she inspires me. you think this one is cute, check out her other one...
http://paintedlollipop.blogspot.com/
Many Joyous Occasions
my friend/photographer's family site, sorry, private
matt, liz and madeline
a new blog I just discovered, very sad but happy too about a baby born the same time as ours (warning: bad language!)
My Chosen Few
a special place for some very close friends
My Life
a good long time navy friend with a very sweet family
My Train of Thought...
my sister's sister in law...we have a lot in common and her kids are super cute.
Nat's Blog
another best friend from high school with the cutest kids ever.
Navy Enginerd
my husband...don't bother checking it, he's too good for blogging...and too busy.
Never Enough Time in the Day
friend from TX, married one of my friends from high school
One Patch
a new friend in CT who happens to be related to friends/neighbors from TX. she is going to entertain me this summer and save me money.
Our Time
a very good friend in the navy that is just such a good person.
Pink Polka Dot Chatterbox
my darling sister in law that is too old for her age.
Playing House
a beautiful cousin with an adorable family (i haven't seen her in too long!)
Please Wash Your Hands
hubby's cousin who is beautiful and fun
S.L.A.M. Family
a friend from middle school
ScharPeople
a cousins blog that all get to contribute to
Sixintheworld.com - It’s my world! No, it’s my world…
a fascinating family that traveled the world for a year...look at their older posts.
Sound Bites
my lovely cousin who is amazingly talented with the violin.
Spontaneously Type A
a really good friend/traveling buddy...i idolize her organizational skills...she's got skills.
Spring Ruminations
my mother...she's the best and cutest but she doesn't blog enough. (too busy still taking care of all her kids)
Stir Occasionally
a site set up by Clark's cousins and fam...inspiring and yummy
Stubbs Family Blog
cousins whom i love and adore though i don't comment enough :/
Stuff-n-Stuff
my dear sister who started this whole blogging frenzy...shame on her, she hasn't blogged in a while
Sunnie's Mommy Days
cute friend from TX with lots of girls
Suzie's Petunias
sister who does amazing things and has adorable kids
The Bottrill Family
navy friends that we just really like a whole lot
The Burkinshaws
Clark's cousins...more beautiful people related to the beautiful people from above
The Chamberlain Gang
more beautiful cousins of mine...adorable boys
The Conroys
more Clark cousins related to the oodles of beautiful people up there
The Glass is Half Full
friend from TX/married a good friend from high school
THE SMILING INFIDEL
a very funny lady/friend from TX that is smart and very busy
The Wydick Family Chronicles
a high school friend
this & that
an older sister of my first crush from middle school, cute family
Thorley Family Circus
a navy friend with cute kiddos
Thorn Bush
another Clark cousin (I must really like his family!!)
Three Men and a Lady (and a big dog, too!)
another navy friend and a blogging newcomer
Training Fireballs
a friend we met in our short stint in WA
Twinlinebackers
a new CT friend that i won't leave alone
Unlimited Tater Tots
the oldest and wisest sister, very creative and validating, good with people:)
whatever & stuff
the older sister of a middle school friend, super talented and creative

**If you see your link here and you would rather not be on the list, let me know and I'll remove it promptly.
If you don't see your name listed here its most likely because you are a blog lurker and I don't know you are reading. You see, I really believe in the give and take of the comment section. If you leave a comment I will most certainly go read your blog. That is blogging courtesy...but then of course you get sucked into the blogging vortex. Your eyes will eventually glaze over and when you come to you'll realize suddenly that its two hours later, you're hungry and your husband has gone to bed out of sheer boredom and neglect. Sometimes I actually have to set a timer to remind me that my time is up (and I generally like to limit my time on the computer to a reasonable amount so that my kids won't starve or grow up and move out of the house while I am busy checking e mail and working on my own projects.)
I would have more time to read blogs if I didn't spend 75% of my day picking up after little people and doing normal household things. If anyone has a suggestion on how to cut back by all means, let me know...unless of course your answer is to have fewer children. It's too late for that.
(I apologize for the random pictures...I was just trying to keep things interesting.)

Can I adopt a grown man?

Clark and I have been watching a whole slew of saved Colbert Report episodes. I love Stephen Colbert. I love him in the way that I love my own children...like I want to kiss him on the forehead and tuck him in at night. I am totally endeared to him. Is that bizarre? He just seems really nice and he makes me laugh, a lot. Oh Stephen, will you come live with us as my adopted son?