Grateful.

It seems the Sandy Hooks Elementary commentary is everywhere.  Thoughts, ideas, explanations, people trying to make sense of it in their minds, or simply trying to find a way to cope with hearing that things of that nature are even possible.  I appreciate that as human beings, we reach out to each other at times like this.  Tragedy touches us whether we are directly involved or not.  It is the human condition to feel scared and vulnerable.  We need comfort, validation and encouragement.  We want to know that others hear our concerns, we need to feel connected, safe and together.  It has been no different around our house.  Maybe it's because we are at a stage in our life where that's us.  Three of our kids are in elementary school.  I felt all those same things that others have felt.  That I wanted to keep them all home, under my wing and in my arms.
I remember years ago,  I attended the funeral for the three year old son of some friends of ours.  It was awful.  It was sad.  I went home to my own three year old and wanted nothing more than to hold on to her all day long.  But the day did not turn out that way.  Clark was deployed and both the three year old and eighteen month old were ornery and stubborn.  It was such a difficult day for me.
The bickering has been out of control around here lately.  My sister in law would call it "hormonal spikes" and everyone is having them.  It breaks my heart, as their parent, to hear them be short tempered with one another or to be selfish or use a voice that is less than kind.  Yesterday I had a serious talk with the girls about this.  I wanted them to understand and truly consider the gift that it is to wake up in the morning and have all of their sisters and their brother here.  We talked about the many families who are very suddenly missing a member of their family, and what that must feel like.  The girls were quiet, and contemplative.  For the rest of the day I saw a wonderful transformation.  Not only were they kind, but they were going out of their way to be loving and helpful.  And it made my heart want to weep with gratitude. 
A few years ago when Stephanie Nielson was blogging about the fresh physical and emotional wounds of her accident, I remember vividly where she shared that as she lay under the tree, knowing that she was badly burned and near death, all she wanted was to be at home making dinner for her family.  She talked for months about how badly she wanted to be doing her normal thing; washing dishes, giving baths, doing laundry.  It forever changed my perspective on being a wife and mother.  I still grumble about it from time to time but I am quick to remember that I truly am grateful to serve my family as I do.  I am so grateful for these lessons learned.  Grateful that through trial we can be refined and strengthened through the experiences of others.
I don't know of anyone that wouldn't wish that these families could have just one more day with their loved ones.  But I am grateful that so many can be touched by the reminder to hold our dear ones a little closer than we did yesterday.  We can honor some part of their memory by having a little more patience, a little more kindness and a little more gratitude for the gift of each and every day.